A Roommate of a Kind
by Sugary-B
Summary: Aoba works hard to perfect his culinary skills and his college roommate Noiz is just an unhelpful and anti-social brat.


_**AN** I tried to finish this sooner and post it up about two days ago but it's just so long, which I didn't originally plan for it to be, it just happened. I'm not parting it either because I feel like it'll loose its effect of the ongoing day this oneshot happens in, so please read at a steady and healthy pace._

_Here we go then with my first dmmd fic, and I hope you enjoy!_

* * *

When Aoba's not working at Heibon he's spending time with his grandmother. And when he's not doing that, he's at home perfecting his culinary skills to avoid shaming her, hoping that he can soon enough bring her a winning meal for her to enjoy. Rather that than have her dismiss his attempt and throw the unwanted food at his face and insist that he is why people would literally like the option to starve.

He sighs at the familiarity of his grandmother's harshness and carries on stirring around a thickness in a big pot. It's meant to be soup, the results of a recipe he borrowed from a friend and has been following this afternoon. And it was going great, still is in-fact. Maybe there isn't a way to tell that his tendency to be clumsy at inconvenient times had kicked in through his hand and made it jolt just as he was shaking the tub of spices over the pot. The whole lot came out instead of just _a pinch_, like the recipe instructed.

He was in a pinch, for god's sake. Never mind the stupid spice!

_'Ah, the better to destroy your taste-buds with_'. Aoba self-attacks his terrible lack of cooking skills. But see, when he does he was convinced that it wouldn't hurt like if it was being said by someone else. Apparently. But it doesn't change the whelming moments that try to lure him in to crying, the lull spell of being an incompetent grandson that he wants to put a permanent stop to. As his grandmother would say, he only knows how to _fiddle around with toys and seduce customers over the phone_. (And because of that, she didn't half believe him most of the time when he talked about how his day at work went, thinking he was making it up. She once turned up at his workplace and demanded to see who he was getting involved with, thinking her grandson had shoved a handful of men in to a closet until her upcoming departure). So as far as he knows, he's not good for much else. If only he could fiddle around and seduce the soup enough for it to turn out good.

_'No, wait! That sounds really strange!...'_

"I'm going now." The other resident of the apartment, the college student with messy blond hair and an expression that would say he's rarely seen the sun or laughed enough times, Noiz, calls out to his roommate from by the door. _  
_

"Finished your assignment?" Aoba asks, glancing over his shoulder for just a moment and then concentrating on his soup again. If he stirs it too much it'll turn thin, but he can't afford to leave it to burn either so he's working under a wavering balance.

"Yeah. Wasn't much to do on it." Noiz had shut himself away in his room yesterday in the afternoon and this was the first time since then that he was seeing Aoba.

"You didn't ask me for help." Aoba says as he digs a ladle in to the soup to have a taste. His face scrunches up at the ambush of the overused mixed spices and he shivers at the clumsy memory. "Remember? I said I'd help if you needed me."

"And you also said breakfast would be ready before I go."

"And it is!" Aoba says, promising him. He's already frantic over the mess that's been made but now his roommate won't shut up about who said what and when! "Hold on. Here, taste this..." He holds out the ladle to his roommate after scooping up some more soup and waits for him to come over. He can see the hesitation in the way he glances back at the door, at his watch and the way one foot taps against the floor. Noiz does come over eventually though, making a small 'om' sound as his lips close over the ladle, and that's at least one thing Aoba can say he was successful with today, persuading his not easy to push roommate. "So?...How is it?"

Noiz's taste in food doesn't expand much beyond takeout, something he's lived off for a long time. But he can't overlook the way his tongue is tingling. It usually does that when he eats, but it's strange this time. He concludes that it's the reaction to eating something that's not edible. "I'll buy takeout on my way home."

"O-oi! You could at least properly tell me what you think!"

"I did."

"Liar!"

"You're just deaf."

"I am not!" Aoba fumes in refusal. "Anyway, it'll be fine! I can always add..." He wants to say that he can make the soup better by adding rice or a side dish. But when he can barely convince himself, it won't do much good trying to convince his stiff roommate.

"Pepperoni good for you?"

"Noiz!"

"...What?"

Aoba wants to insult him and scold him for being rude when he's done what he can. Instead, he turns around and hides his irritated expression, not wanting to be pushed or embarrass himself further. "...Pepperoni's fine with me, thanks."

Noiz nods, and says, "See ya." as he heads over to the door again and finally leaves the apartment.

=x=

"You're late again."

_'Only by three minutes and no one else is even in the room yet.'_ Noiz thinks to himself as he strolls in to the classroom and plays innocent to the hawk-eyes of professor Mink watching him from the front desk. "But I'm here." He says as a matter of fact as he sits where he always does, at the front because he's not afraid to get caught spacing out or playing games. If he wants to do those things then he will. It's not like he doesn't keep up in criminal law class anyway, and thank god it's the only class he has today. He can go home in three hours when it's lunch time.

"Unfortunately." Mink adds on.

'Whatever' Noiz thinks, his no-caring attitude coming out along with a tub of pasta he bought from a convenience store on his way here, that-along with Aoba wanting him to be his test subject-being the reason he was late. And because he's not someone who adapts to mornings well.

"Oi, maniac, class is about to begin."

Noiz shrugs, knowing he can still care less and chews on the pasta.

"Mommy not feeding you?"

"My roommate can't cook."

Mink smirks at the correction but it's barely a difference. "It's rude to not appreciate his efforts, even if all he can do is throw random shit together and make it worse."

"You're only talking like that because you want me to like his food," Noiz swallows more pasta before continuing, but his mouth is full again and he speaks in between the chews. "Because then there's a chance he'll come in to the class again to give me the lunch he made for me that I forgot."

On purpose, of course.

"Wrong, smartass. I want you to like his food so you'll stop stuffing your face in my class."

"Can't be helped."

Mink sighs, and rather than going in to a full-scale string of curses and shouting that'll have teachers from down the hall coming in and asking questions, he leans back in to his chair and lets his stress spread out along the leather as it cushions his muscles. God damn it, Noiz is one irritating bastard. He's his least favourite student.

And _no student_ is his favourite.

The rest of the a little over thirty class usher themselves in to the room. They're much later than Noiz but just to piss him off, Mink doesn't say anything. He imagines the curse he's telepathically sent, which he gladly ignores because he can deal with that brat another time. But right now, it's time to stand and teach, as he's paid to do (because no, he doesn't get a bonus for _literally_ beating knowledge in to kids. Hmph, and that would've given the rest of the members of staff an easier time with their students. Oh well, there sad loss).

"So," Mink begins when he's standing at the front and looking his students in the eyes, scaring them in to complete obedience. They heard he used to beat people who tried to over-rule him and that he's been in and out of prison a few times. The result of this so called 'rumour' was that not one of his students ever asked to go to the bathroom without first asking if it was okay to raise their hand to ask a question. Noiz is the self-granted exception, who leaves as easily as he comes as if the duration of the class is in his hands. "We're gonna start discussing the punishments that were suggested to the criminals who had a hand in the incident with-"

_GURRR~URHHHHP._

"...Oi, brat at the front." Mink says, his tone hinting a promise of physical reprimanding to the kid stupid enough to burp in front of him, let alone while he's explaining today's lesson plan.

No surprise, he's talking to Noiz again who still plays the careless character. He puts his soda can down on the desk and sits up sluggishly."...Pasta's finished, you can start the lesson now."

=x=

Aoba could feel the hot pot of soup jiggle around in his arms as he walked, carefully keeping the blanket he had wrapped it in secure so that it wouldn't fall and expose the pot to allows its contents to escape. On his way to his grandmother's, he was nervous but also hopeful about how things would turn out, having faith in the food this time, regardless of his roommate's reaction earlier.

Noiz likes to play around with him a lot. God knows why he even signed those forms a year and three months ago saying he was fine living with this brat, who had enough money to be living somewhere nice upstate with other rich snobs.

The hot pot of soup wrapped up in a blanket jiggles in Aoba's arms as he walks through the town, on his way to his grandmother's house. He was nervous the whole time but had faith in his food this time, regardless of his roommate's reaction. Noiz liked to play around with him alot. Heaven knows why he signed those forms a year and three months ago and agreed to live with a brat, who could be living a luxurious life with the other rich snobs but no, not now that he's found Aoba who's poor enough to be the best target of his mockery.

_'I'm Noiz and I'm a rich brat blah blah blah," _Aoba childishly mumbles._ 'And I only eat pizza and I'm just gonna say shit about everything you do, blah blah blah blah blah-_

"Aoba!" A man's voice that sounds far away but close enough to pay attention to shouts. From across the street, Aoba can make out a man with a pony-tail . He's Koujaku, the loyal childhood friend most people wish they had. He's also the freelance hairdresser a lot of pretty talk about who runs a small music shop on the side. "How's it going? On your way to see Tae-san?" He asks when the roads are clear of traffic and it's safe enough to cross over, putting on a friendly smile as well.

"Hey, Koujaku. And yeah, with another dish." Aoba says, pointing his chin down at the pot in his arms. "Hopefully I won't get this back in my face."

"I'm sure Tae-san will be merciful this time. She knows you're trying your best and she's only concerned that you're not taking care of yourself."

"I'm twenty-three years old, I can look after myself just fine!"

"I know. Relax." Koujaku gently says. He slides his fingers through the blue strands of Aoba's hair and messes them up in an adoring ruffle. "But do you still cut your hair like you should?"

"Lay off!" Aoba pulls the hand off and moves it away.

"You in a hurry right now or...?"

"Granny said that she'll be out for a bit so I was just gonna let myself in and wait. Why?"

Koujaku offers him an alternative, with a smile. "Want to have tea with me?"

"You asking me out, Koujaku?" Aoba teases him with the obvious, loving the way he makes the older man blush so much that he can't look at him anymore and he has to turn away. He chuckles and finally answers, "Okay."

"Good. I'll pay."

"I wouldn't have said yes if you weren't gonna." Aoba tells him, straight faced. He also enjoys the way Koujaku looks like he's just been slapped, it's really cute. He nudges his friend and cracks a smile, telling him to lighten up because he was only joking.

Sort of.

=x=

_'Gonna tell sensei that you're not paying attention'_.

Noiz was fine with resting on his desk with his head in his folded arms, enjoying how everything else was fading out and turning in to silence while his ears took in the drumming coming in through his lime jelly-earphones from the song he was listening to. Then Ren had to interfere with a warning using snapchat, sending a photo of himself holding his phone up high with Noiz in the background who looked near enough dead, along with the caption he just groaned at. In the picture, Ren's looking at him like he's a no-good slacker but it's a fact that people become tired after eating.

Noiz doesn't like Ren much. He does enough to exchange contact information sure, but still. He's harbored feelings of intolerance towards him since that time when Aoba came in to his class with the 'forgotten' lunch and became a flustered high school girl the moment Ren started talking to him.

_'That fucking Romeo, always talking people up.' _Noiz puts his exhaustion to the side for a moment so he can sit up and reply with his own picture, of a single finger and a blatant cliche label that suits the potential tell-tale.

'_Fucking teacher's pet_'.

=x=

"Eh? Granny...Wha-?" Aoba looks at the message he just opened and after reading it for the fifth time he still can't understand it, not properly.

Koujaku peeks over his cup of tea. "What is it?"

"She wants me to bring Noiz over with me." Aoba explains as he turns his phone around for Koujaku to read the latest text from his grandmother.

"Noiz?...Ah, your roommate. But what for?"

"Like I know! But she seems to like him more than me. While she's yelling at me she's dotting over him." Aoba changes his tone to sound like his elderly second mother, respectfully but jealously pouring in. "Have some tea, Noiz. Here, fresh donuts for you. Aoba eats enough for all of us so here's the last one for you, eat it well."

"H-hey..." Koujaku starts laughing behind his hand.

"It's not funny, Koujaku!"

"Sorry! But aren't you overreacting?"

"You're just saying that to stay on Granny's good side because you want her blessing!"

"Blessing? What ever for?" Koujaku asks with all the innocence he can play around with while hiding his coy smile behind his cup as he takes another sip.

"This like the sixth time this month you've asked me out!"

"You keep count? Aoba, I'm so touched-"

"It's not like that, don't make this date weird."

"Oh, so this is a date?"

"N-No!...We're just hanging out...a-as friends."

"So then why are you blushing?"

"...B-Because!...You're..." Aoba doesn't have an answer other than '_because you're annoying the hell out of me'_ but saying that will just get him more hysterical. He had enough of this from his roommate this morning!

Koujaku takes the absence of an answer with a smile, but it goes when he asks about Noiz. "How are you doing living with that brat anyway? Is he pulling his own weight? You're not picking up after him, are you?"

"No way." Aoba shakes his head and says, and then has some of his tea which was staring to go a little tepid. He doesn't enjoy it as much as Koujaku so he won't drink it as quickly, but he won't let it go to waste either. "Besides, he doesn't let me in his room. The only chance I get to go in there is in secret while he's at college. I try to clean up a bit but I always trip over the wires in there! There are so many, it's a total wreck!"

Koujaku frowns as he sets his now empty cup down. "Honestly, you shouldn't be cleaning up after him."

"Well _he_ won't! So what other choice do I have?!"

"Leave him be. Eventually he could get lost under all those wires."

"That would be bad."

"Would it really?"

"He pays half the rent. If he left then I'd have to pay it all by myself and I can barely afford to buy those tubs of special mixed herbs!" Aoba furiously explains in panic.

"...Sorry?" Koujaku says, confused.

"Nothing! And I-I-I didn't put too much of anything in anywhere!"

"Aoba, are you alright?"

Aoba freezes and looks at Koujaku with eyes so wide it's like he doesn't understand where or who he is anymore. One moment he was drinking tea and then all of a sudden Noiz came up and he had a flashback to this morning's horrible events and he was panicking beyond his know how. "Th-The tea...it's going straight to my head." He says as an excuse, slowly but finally calming himself. The struggle to become a better grandson was taking it's toll on him, and Noiz isn't exactly helping.

He usually panicked when Noiz was brought up. Or if not him then cooking. He has another flashback, this time to a few months ago when he attended a social gathering of people who loved to cook. He wasn't the only guy there but he was the only one whose appearance said otherwise, so he thought he would blend in with the women. Only, the moment he started talking and had the ignorant nerve to refer to a whisk as the _spider-web stick_, the women turned on him and pushed him out of their circle, shaking their heads in disbelief at what they thought was a poor joke. How quickly the women had gone quiet would always haunt him.

Or was it because he started talking about the five second rule?

=x=

Noiz stands close to the edge of the brick platform where a train is scheduled to pass soon, so close that the points of his shoes are just over the yellow line marked down to stop civilians from being too close, but not so close that it's easy for him to accidentally fall down on the tracks. He's not stupid. It's just the thrill of self-daring to be close to danger and light up the spark of fear is a feeling he finds interesting and it's fun, though it's never surpassed a school fight.

Paper flickers in the gentle gust of a breeze from underneath a staple on the bulletin board a bit away from Noiz's left side. Peaking at it out of curiosity, he reads the big bold lettering with its jazzy font made to look appealing and it's images of food and people smiling while in an area of a kitchen. It's an advertisement for cooking classes, coincidentally at the college he attends. Going over to it for a better look and to read the essential information, he thinks of Aoba.

And then, he's not quite sure about what to do next.

Soon, his train comes in on its scheduled time and he boards it. When the train journey ends, he walks the distance from the station to his apartment building, takes the elevator up to the seventh floor and walks straight down the hallway with his keys in hand, a small bunny key-chain dangling from it and being played with between his fingers. He swings the center loop of the key around his finger once just before he reaches his apartment door and then pushes the key in to the hole, starting to turn the lock anti-clockwise.

"Noiz-san, you're back!" A man with a head full of fluffy white hair excitedly pops out from his apartment eight doors down on the left, the special one with a crayon drawn name sign. Clear greets both Noiz and Aoba like this whenever they run in to each other out in the hall a lot or get caught in the same elevator. And sometimes, he'll see one of them on the streets and get so excited that he'll drop everything at his flower shop (along with the customer he might be dealing with) just to say hello. He's easily attached to people even if he barely knows them, he's just that friendly and open but so very eccentric that Noiz can't help concern himself over it, for the sake of his own sanity.

"...Hi." Noiz replies just to be polite and goes back to unlocking his door, _quicker_ this time. Just this once, he wishes Aoba had been forgetful again and left the door unlocked so he could escape this a lot faster.

He's not going to stand around and interact with this fucking nutjob.

Clear doesn't pick up on the anti-social behaviour and casually starts talking. Even if Noiz walks blatantly walks passed him and walks out the elevator at the last second just before the doors close to take the stairs instead, he doesn't hold any grudges and will always welcome him like a good friend. "I noticed that Aoba-san isn't home."

"He's gone to see his grandmother."

"Oh, 'course!" Clear seems to remember knowing about it. "She must be enjoying my food right now then."

"Your food?," Noiz repeats in question, now facing him. "What do you mean?"

"A little while ago after you left for college, Aoba-san was at my door. He was all hysterical and asked me to make him soup he could take to his grandmother. He didn't really say why but he told me he appreciated my help. So there you have it, that's why."

So the hardworking grandson finally caved, eh? Noiz had a feeling he would sooner or later despite his pride due to his lack of self-awareness to know when things weren't going to turn out alright. After all, Noiz had tasted the soup himself this morning and it would've only been cruel for Aoba to serve it to anyone else, especially his old relative.

"Noiz-san, do you ever, like maybe...think about dating Aoba-san?"

"...No." The small pause was Noiz trying not to hurl at the horrid question. And what a random horrid question it was. Was Clear about to feed him some monologue or misdirected confession about his feelings for his roommate and tell him to make himself scarce as the competition? (Funny enough, for an eccentric florist who did things that no one could ever expect, him saying that kind of thing would be predictable of him).

"...Oh, okay. I just thought it best to ask since-"

"I don't care. Just go away."

"Wah, you're so mean, Noiz-san!" Clear whines, puffing out his cheeks. "You're like that flower that scratched me today in the shop!"

"Don't compare me to a plant, you weirdo." Noiz, thin patience completely dissipated, speaks to him for the final time and then unlocks his apartment door and goes inside, making sure to shut it fast enough to keep Clear from being successful with his sudden lunge to throw himself inside. That guy has issues and can't understand that he isn't wanted, not by Noiz anyway. Aoba talks to him no problem but Noiz thinks that's a little okay since he's weird too.

Ah, now he can put his plan to watch entertainment for children until he's bored or tired in to action. Waking up early in the morning especially just to have Professor Mink get on his case is never the best thing on Noiz's schedule. Noiz unravels the combined green and black scarf from his neck as he sinks in to the comfortable leather sofa and switches the HD wall-mounted flat screen TV on, ready to watch SpongeBob. He's about three seconds in to the iconic opening when he gets a text from Aoba.

_**Inbox (1), From; Roommate**_  
_Granny wants you to come over so I'll meet you at the station drop off._  
_You better come! Don't make me go alone when you know what she's like!... ToT_

Seriously? After the (usual) morning he's had and now that he's settled in, Aoba wants him to drag his ass over to his old lady's place? Augh, the perks of living alone independently without a roommate to come in and cook bad food and then make you eat it and just change your plans without your permission. Oh well, at the very least he doesn't completely mind because Tae isn't bad company, at least not for him. He'll surely enjoy watching her yell at her only grandson's terrible efforts.

That's a lot more entertaining than watching SpongeBob.

Noiz covers his neck with the scarf again and cautiously leaves the apartment again, head poking outside first for security in case Clear's been sitting outside the door all this time. Speaking of the devil, the florist is actually over by the elevator, looking depressed and lost while repeatedly pressing his face against the button that opens and closes the doors, making them do so many times over. Rejection isn't something he can take well-i_f ever at all,_ Noiz adds. If he wants to get out of here then he'll have to sneak passed him, otherwise that's it.

He moves slowly in small steps at first, eyes on the corner turn at the end of the hall, glancing from there to Clear to make sure he's still occupied in his own weirdness. '_The weirdo. Must be boring not having any brain cells...'_ He thinks when Clear starts to slide down the wall of the elevator, head first with his neck, back and then whole lower body following until he's squatting in a strange position.

Noiz barely stifles a scoff and turns away to look at the corner at the end of the hallway again, closer to it now than before thankfully.

"NOIZ-SAN!"

_'Crap'_. The blonde fail-ninja breathes in what he can as fast as he can to carry himself out of the area in a suspicious speed, legs nearly fumbling as he speed walks away from Clear and turns at the corner to go through the emergency exit doors to use the stairs as an alternative. He takes them in sets of three's to hurry the escape.

"Noiz-san, wait please! Hold on, why are you running from me?!" Clear shouts down to him, standing at the doorway. He pouts again when he doesn't get an answer and decides to jump down in-between the railing, skipping a few floors straight from the eighth and falling inhumanly. He lands on the second floor, dis-organised with messy hair and one collar upturned. When he sits up, he rubs his face and moans in agony. "A-aaaah! Ow...owowow, that hurt very much!...Nooooooiiiiiiiizzzz-saaan, can you please wait?"

Noiz doesn't think he can and is sure he won't. So he takes this chance to leave the building and the eccentric-also probably not even human-neighbour far behind, messaging Aoba on his way to the station.

_**Outbox (1), To; Roommate  
**__Let's move._

_=x=_

Tae eats the soup with judging lips to get the best taste the meal can possibly offer, with her grandson and his roommate intensely watching and waiting for her approval or dismissal.

"...Well I'm still alive so it's not that bad."

"Wh-Wha-?! Of course! Granny, you're as fit as a-"

"Save it, Aoba." Tae cuts in and watches her grandson duck his head a little in retreat. She looks at Noiz sitting beside him, quiet and eyes not focusing on anything in particular with his arms stiffly secured in a bored fold. "So then, Noiz, how is my grandson doing?"

"He's...okay."

"Just okay?"

"Yeah. He cooks a lot."

"Ah, and I'm guessing this is the result?" Tae asks, pointing down at the soup.

Noiz glances at the soup and memories of talking to Clear fall in. "...Guess so."

"I see." Tae nods. She's not easy to convince. In fact, she looks as if she doesn't believe any of that. Still, she leaves things be and excuses herself to go in to the next room and turn the television on for a moment to check the weather forecast for tomorrow.

Aoba nudges him once she's gone. "Oi, Noiz, what's with you? Granny's worried about me and you're only giving her vague answers!"

"I'm not, I'm saying the truth."

"No you're not!"

"...Hypocrite." Noiz says, huffing out under his breath. "Don't sit there and lecture me about honesty when you're lying to your own grandmother. I know you didn't make the soup, that screw-loose florist told me everything."

Aoba's eyes widen and he makes an expression similar to the one he showed Koujaku earlier and tries to explain himself in a fit of panic. "I-It's not like that!...I ruined my soup but it was already gonna taste bad, I could tell! S-So I thought I could get away with it if I...I mean, it's just a small favour and Clear was willing to help!"

"But does she know?"

"No and I'm not going to tell her!"

"Fine, I will." Noiz says and stands up.

Aoba leaps up from his chair and grabs his roommate's hand desperately. "Don't you dare!"

"Let go of me."

"Promise me first that you won't say anything!"

"_I said_ let go of me."

"Honestly, I can hear your lovers' quarrel from the next room. I'm _old_, not deaf." Tae's voice suddenly intervenes as she re-enters the kitchen. "And you can quit holding hands now because no one needs to promise anyone anything. And I already know you didn't make this soup."

"...H-Hah?" Aoba's face glazes over in a royal flush of red after hearing how his act of desperation seemed like he just wanted to be affectionate with his roommate, and he pulls his hand away. "H-How can you say that, Granny? And how do you even know about...ah, n-no! T-Tell me, what's the weather for tomorrow? Planning to go somewhere nice with your friends?"

"_Aoba_." Tae says firmly, giving him that look to say 'who are you kidding?'. "Just how much of a fool do you take me for?! As if I wouldn't know how your cooking tastes after all this time I've been used as your guinea pig!"

"You're not a guinea pig, you're my granny!"

"...But they start with the same letter, granny and guinea pig." Noiz comments, interested in the ironic coincidence.

Tae glares at him now instead, wanting to make something known for the sake of something like this happening again. "You probably thought you were doing the right thing wanting to tell me the truth but next time just go along and humour him! If you had used your brain then I could've stopped being his test subject and live an easier life but now he'll keep bringing more food. Tsk, honestly, youngsters these days haven't got a clue!"

It's music to Aoba's ears and he's in pure delight over the fact that finally he's not the one being scolded. He takes joy in obnoxiously laughing and pointing at his roommate's stern expression. "Ha ha! Granny got mad at you this time instead!"

Noiz side-glances him. "You're like a little kid."

"Hey now, c'mon. It's not like she can dote on you forever. Your time was coming and-"

"Will you be quiet?!" Granny loudly commands. Aoba jumps in surprise and backs away from her a bit to awkwardly hide behind Noiz who, after having a finger pointed in his face and being laughed at, isn't keen on helping him and moves his body to side. But Aoba persistently follows him, hands locked on to his sides. "I'll tell you this now, Aoba, you won't be coming back here again until you learn how to feed yourself at least! And if you dare tell a tale to me again then I'll beat sense in to that brainless head of yours! Understand?!"

A wounded Aoba shakily sticks his head out. "...Y-Yes, ma'am."

=x=

When they leave Tae's house to catch the next train running in to their side of town and they get back in to the apartment for eight, Aoba's in the middle of and finishing up the questioning he's done for most of the journey home. "And what was with that text you sent me before? You think we should move?"

"The florist is weird." Noiz says as he places the box of pizza he bought on the way home on the table in the dinning area.

"Clear?...Why?"

"He's _weird_. I don't know how else to say it."

Aoba's eyes roll. "That's _not_ a reason to move apartments, Noiz. We're good where we are. And before you call someone weird you should get to know them. Clear being different to me and you doesn't mean we can't all be friends."

"Fine, go ahead and defend your boyfriend then."

"Clear's not my boyfriend!"

"Huh? Oh right, you like that Kohaku guy. Or Mitsuki, whatever his name is."

"It's Kou_jaku_ and for the record _Mizuki_ has a girlfriend! But what do you take me for anyway?...Think I'll just go out with anyone if I happen to see them a lot?"

"Isn't that how dating works?"

"Yes but there's more to it than that! Otherwise _we'd_ be da...U-uh, nevermind!" Aoba excuses himself from that subject and ends it there. It was going someplace strange and wherever that could be is now off limits for discussion. "A-Anyway, thanks for buying the dinner tonight."

"Mm." Noiz hums in reply. It was nice of him to pay for it all by himself when he could've easily insisted that Aoba cough up his share for half of the pizza. But Noiz had figured, with how things have been going for his roommate and his cooking lately, that he needed to be cut some slack (and the slack was coming to him in the form of pizza so 'itadakimasu' to him).

Aoba's chewing a delicious mouthful of pizza while holding another slice in his hand at the ready. He chokes on the second slice when Noiz suddenly decides to just announce his poor financial status. "E-Excuse me?!..."

Noiz groans, not a fan of repetition. "You don't make a lot of money."

"...I-I know that!"

"So if you're gonna spend what little money you have then you should make sure that it doesn't go to waste."

"I _know_ already, you don't need to tell me that! I really am trying to get better!..."

"If you want to get better then just do it."

"Easy for you to say! I bet you grew up with people waiting hand and foot on you so you didn't have to cook a thing! And you can just order a pizza whenever you want!"

"Only co's you can't cook, otherwise I wouldn't have to." Noiz explains, being blunt to repay the assumption that was made about his childhood. It's not about being waited on but the pity behind never being able to enjoy a home cooked meal until he met Aoba and came to know his grandmother. And now that he knows what that's like, sometimes pizza can't always satisfy him the same way anymore. So he wants to do something about it and that's when the flyer he noticed earlier at the station, the one he uncharacteristically was compelled to pull down, is taken out of his pocket and held out to Aoba. "Here, I saw this at the station today and...whatever, just take it."

Aoba hesitates and stares at it as if it's triggered with something risky, because after-all his anti-social brat of a roommate who never wants to do anything for anyone, let alone selflessly, is giving him something. He takes it with both hands though when Noiz grunts out of impatience. "...A home-ec college class?...And it's at your college!"

"Yeah." Noiz says and nods. "Because you want to get better right? If Tae-san has to be your guinea pig to be assured that you're alright on your own then don't bring her the usual crap, bring her something that's actually edible."

Aoba chooses to take the high road and ignore the insult. "So in other words...when you saw this, you thought of me?"

"...Yeah."

"Noiz, I...don't know what to say." Aoba hugs the flyer to his chest, touched by the selfless gesture that was done for his sake. All this time, Noiz hasn't been supporting him by buying take out food all the time. But this...wow, it's a real turn around and quite the surprise.

But it's a nice surprise nonetheless.

"Say you'll go to the classes."

"I guess it couldn't hurt. Okay, I'll go back to college!" Aoba smiles, excited about the opportunity being presented to him. He had thought about taking cooking classes before, but the experience of being shunned by those women had ruined that. But since Noiz is inviting him this time, he wants to show that he's thankful. "Ah, I haven't been in school for a while so things must be different now huh?"

"Not really. Teachers and classes are still boring and people are still annoying." Noiz says as walks over to the sofa and it feels good to sink in to it again. No cartoons are on at this time of the day however, but maybe there's a good film or documentary on small creatures or something.

"Not everyone is like that!" Aoba debates as he brings the pizza box over and joins his roommate on the couch, ready to watch whatever he puts on until they go to sleep.

"Just the people I avoid."

"Hah? You avoid everyone!"

"Exactly."

**! OMAKE !**

Next week comes around pretty quick and the day goes on in the same speed.

Noiz turns around the next corner to go through the hallway and blatantly walk right passed his criminal law classroom but stops when he notices his eccentric neighbour in a classroom on the other side, coincidentally the home economics class, and he's standing at the front. Is he teaching? Since when? Noiz's curiosity leads him over to peek in through the window on the door.

And at the front, introducing himself in an anxious fluster, is Aoba, the new home economics for beginners student.

Looking back at Clear though, he recites the few and completely unrelated fields he seems to deal in. "A florist-" Yep. "Stunt man-" From the mad chase down the stairs of the fire escape when he literally jumped a couple of floors and managed to survive. "-And now he's a cooking teacher." The last one is new but it helps sum everything up. "...He's a robot."

"Or an alien." Koujaku opts, suddenly standing beside him from out of nowhere.

"Stupid. Why would an alien be interested in human food?"

"Why would a robot?!"

"Ahem." Professor Mink clears his throat from behind them. Rather than questioning Koujaku, who is neither a teacher nor a student at the college or even someone he knows, he interrogates his least favourite student. "Shouldn't you be in class?"

"It's yours, that's _why_ I'm skipping."

"Fuck's sake, brat." Noiz is the only reason he ever gets to shout, curse, belittle, threaten and throw objects at a student and still get paid for it!

"What about you? It's _your_ class."

Mink ignores the question and nods at Koujaku. "What about him? He's not a teacher here right?"

"Oh, don't mind me." Koujaku says, and smiles like his lady-killer charm will let his unauthorised time here slide. "I'm just here to watch out for someone."

"You're both old perverts." Noiz says.

"I'm not old!"

Mink leans closer to peek in to the room, closely looking at a particular student. "I'm just here to make sure he can make you something decent so you don't stuff your face in my class anymore."

"Whatever. Your eyes are on his ass."

"Shut it or I'll fail you."

They all hear screams and clashing and clanging of falling objects that get knocked over from inside the classroom and a hoard of students huddle together near the door at the back of the room, passing questions around among themselves in fear. Over their panicked voices, a series of curses and cries of pain come from near the front.

Then Clear, all too smiley, steps out, closes the door behind him and stands in front of it as a barrier to make sure no one goes through, like he's hiding a big secret. "It's nice to see everyone together like this! But-Oh, Professor Mink-san, don't you have a class right now?"

"Save it," Mink nods to the door. "What's going on? You coming at your students with a knife? I heard you were insane-"

"Noooooo, of course not!" Clear whines, and pouts a little at the terrible accusation. "It's Aoba-san! He was...trying to work the gas stove when...his hair caught on fire."

Silence.

"No! Seriously?!" Koujaku asks, surprised and concerned. "Is he okay? That idiot, he should've known it would get in the way. I keep telling him to let me cut his hair! Or the least he could've done is tie it up for now!"

"I told him that as well but he said something about migraines...?" Clear looks to the three of them for answers but it's so strange, they can't even pretend to understand. Another chorus of things colliding and smacking on the floor pull Clear back in to the room where he ushers the huddle of students back to their stations while he checks on his new student's hair.

"...I'm going home." Noiz announces openly and makes his way down the hall again, leaving the other two to do whatever they please. He really can't wait around for his roommate but he still hopes for the best.

_**Outbox (2), To; Roommate**_  
_not ordering pizza this time tonight, so don't mess up in there._


End file.
